Shelter In A Sea of Change

While history is steadily trying to repeat the worst parts of itself, those of us not directly involved, or caught up as bystanders (while doing what we can to help via donations, letter writing, and phone calls), feel an impending SOMETHING.

I’m not calling it doom exactly. We could call it that, but DOOM seems rather final and I don’t think we’re there yet (or more accurately, I refuse to give up hope). It could be naïve of me, certainly. Regardless of where things are going, now more than ever, networks and community are becoming the center that seems to hold when all else appears to be falling apart.

Through the recent TikTok fiasco, it was interesting to see how people responded. Some cried, some pointed their communities to other platforms, some moved to RedNote (Xiaohongshu).

Professional communities went through a shift as well. Moving from Twitter to BlueSky and Mastadon. A lot of tech began separating themselves from the bird app when it was clear it would no longer be the open platform it once was. LinkedIn still remains a good place to share information, either from source websites or various blog apps like Substack. There’s also various Slacks and Discords as well.

Granted a lot of these communities are mostly parasocial in nature, given that many of us have never met in person. It doesn’t mean they are less helpful or less of a community because of their virtual aspect.

In the wake of layoffs that started in 2023, and continue into 2025. Several industries, roles, and careers were disrupted, changed, or phased out all together. We need our networks and communities more than ever.

If you’re new to tech or any professional community, I urge you to reach out and join groups, attend conferences, and network with coworkers.

Every major city has professional groups you can join. As someone that is more naturally an introvert, I know how hard this can be. Gather your spoons, do what you can. It doesn’t take much to begin building professional relationships. However, as with anything, you need to put in the work.

The biggest boost to my career, and the largest safety net I’ve had was around networking and professional relationships/friendships. Folks I’ve met through my career, folks I’ve had the privilege to work with, and folks that I’ve been on speaking stages with from time to time.

Locally, it’s important to find yourself in community. While these communities could be career related, they don’t necessarily need to be.

If you can find a gaming group or a book club that also has a few folks that share like careers with you, that’s just as important.

Accessibility can be an issue for a lot of folks, and that’s where online social groups can help. Do what you can, where you can, is the whole point.

Whether its in-person, online, career oriented or not, sharing your thoughts and existence with a number of people and listening to others shared thoughts and existence will do more than save your sanity. It could help you jumpstart or pivot in your career.

Likewise, if you are in communities and can provide jumpstarts and pivots, do so. This is what matters. A lot of folks try to join, or leverage a community without having participated in that community (Looking at you HR Teams). It becomes a tough sell for everyone else involved because the community design should be built on mutual aid, and collaboration.

You might ask: what if you haven’t found your spot, but you are enjoying some community interactions. I would say that’s okay, but also, you shouldn’t expect the community to provide aid (and this could be anything from job listings, to recommendations, to donations) if you haven’t made an effort help others in that community as well.

THE LEAST you can do in a group, especially online, is share job openings you know are available at your business, or help others learn about those openings. Do more if you can. Volunteer. Provide equipment. Give small loans or gifts. Hold talks or participate in panels. Mentor. Whatever makes sense, do those things! You won’t regret it.

Small FAQ:
Q) What if I don’t like my job right now, but there are job openings? Should I share them anyway?

A) Yes. Here’s why. Someone else might like your job place better than you. Previously, I had a hard time sharing job openings when I was unhappy with my workplace. I didn’t want to be responsible for someone joining and also being unhappy. Alas, this mindset isn’t a great one. It’s limiting people before they get a chance to see for themselves. They could be wildly happy, so my assumptions should stay out of it. Share the job openings!

Realtor.com Openings: Austin area.

Q) Is culture/identity an important part of network?

A) Yes! If you have a professional group that focuses on a particular part of your culture/identity, especially if it’s a marginalized one, try to be involved in those as much as larger groups.

There are a great deal of culturally agnostic groups (or at least they try to be). It’s good to be involved in those, but as a marginalized identity, being involved in Queer professional groups also lets me balance information from other groups with safety concerns, and possible business practices.

In other words, by being involved in both, I’m more likely to end up in a place that is more concerned for my overall safety as a member of the queer community.

Q) Should I start my own community group?

A) Maybe. I won’t say no, because sometimes the time and energy to form a group is absolutely worth it. However, what I often see happen is that folks are eager to come together, and then after a few months, things go quiet. As a leader, you have to put a lot of work into keeping a group going. That’s taxing on time, resources, and mental space. Additionally, you have to focus on the needs of the group members as well.

Think about your goals when taking this path. Would they be better served in an existing group or at an existing event? Maybe gathering a group at a conference and asking questions of each other would be better. (Groups can be short term vs long term. Meet a few times a year. It’s still valid. There are no organization rules here.) Maybe helping an existing group’s leadership could be the better answer. Maybe something uni-directional would be better, like a podcast, blog, or vlog. (Appearing on other podcasts or writing guest blogs is also a great way to collaborate!)

Q) Do mentor/mentee situations work?

A) Yes! I’ve been in several of these and have done one time chats with folks looking for advice about their career. I’ve also been the mentee and learned A LOT about career and industry from those that have more insight and reach than I do.

Everyone has some knowledge regardless of where you are at in your career. Sharing it with someone, and having someone share their perspectives with you is also important. Newer folks can see things that those of us in our careers for a longer stretch aren’t immediately aware of. That’s the nature of these relationships. Everyone can learn something.

Keeping in touch after a collaboration is a great opportunity to grow your network and help others as they come up in the industry.

There are so many opportunities available. You’re not alone, even if it seems like it some days. Brains can be scum like that. So if you’re feeling lost or restless, that’s okay. A lot of us are feeling that way. Take the time to seek out others that have similar interests. Contribute where you can. Even small contributions can have a large impact.

Don’t beat yourself up about how much or how little you are participating in your current connections and communities. Rest, watch, participate when you can. Move on if you feel like the group or you are no longer benefiting from your participation. Not every group will be a good fit, and you shouldn’t feel like you have to maintain connections to every group you join or are invited into. Cultivate those relationships that are mutual and bring you joy. Do the things, and participate in the things that bring you and your communities hope. Most of all-ask for help/advice/ideas. AND give help/advice/ideas. Don’t seek to be perfect in your participation, just seek to participate and show up when it matters to someone or yourself.